HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
Randomize
