don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
Randomize
