so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
What's an appropriate engagement gift for the girl that's marrying your brother's Tuesday night hookup? Cause all I can think of is vodka and Kleenex.
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
Randomize
