I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
Randomize
