Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
I woke up and went to my kitchen naked and decided I wanted a fruit cup. Ate said fruit cup. Look over and notice my male neighbor is staring at me
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
My new successful method of booty calling is sending a screencap of a map with the shortest route from their location to mine highlighted.
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
Randomize
