Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
its been so long since i'vebeen laid i've forgotten what a penis looks like. When a guy makes me hot i picture him finishing the job by whipping a multi-setting showerhead out of his pants.
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
Randomize
