She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
I won't be able to make it. Too hung over. Can't hold down fluids. I'm in the bathtub trying to hydrate my body through osmosis. And yes, Tequila Tuesday is totally still on for tonight.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
Was about to close the deal last night until he said he hadn't seen the Taylor Swift video. So I made him watch it before I let him have sex with me.
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
Randomize
