Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
i just turned barefoot contessa into a drinking game. everytime she uses a knife butter or salt i drink.
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
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