I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
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