I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
My favorite part of you downing a fifth of fireball in my apartment by yourself is the shot glass in the sink. It's like you attempted moderation and were just like "Fuck this."
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
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