you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
Randomize
