His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
Apparently I was so drunk I threw my entire wallet at the stripper on stage. That was the third time I should've gotten kicked out.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
Randomize
