thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
Just took my morning after pill in the library
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
So. Much. Porn.
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize
