his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize
