Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
Life is so much better after having sex.
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
Why was I drunk tweeting incorrect Beyonce lyrics last night?
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
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