I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
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