i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize
