we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
i spelled "betch" that way on purpose, don't question my abilities as a drunk texter
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
You ate ashes out of my bong
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
Randomize