guys are not supposed to queef...right?
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
I'm gonna go drown myself in the shower. Make sure to cover me up before the paramedics arrive. I'm too fat to be seen naked right now.
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
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