This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
