Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
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