I wish I only lived at night.
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
Every fourth of July I get sentimental when I think back to the one where we drove around baked off our asses crashing multiple cookouts listening to Team America's "America, Fuck Yea" on repeat. I miss us.
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
Randomize
