This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
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