He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out
why what happened?
Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
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