people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
