I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
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