I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
True love is when you jack off and continue talking to the girl you like
Why do you text me weird shit like this?
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Randomize
