i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
Did you just see the Batmobile???
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
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