So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
Wingman of the year award. I made out with her gay roommate in order for you to get laid. Better have been good.
The gay roommate was probably better than her. Consider yourself lucky.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Randomize
