It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
The power of my boobs compel you
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
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