Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
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