I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
It doesn't matter how many times you look in your purse, Your keys are not going to be there. Maybe you left them at the bar.
Maybe they fell out of my pocket last night when I rolled down the hill.
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
Guy running next to me at the gym is judging me. I think he can smell the whiskey leaking out of my pores.
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
Randomize
