It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
You need a sexual gate keeper
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
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