All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
Randomize
