it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
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