WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
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you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
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I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries