Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

(909): View more from California

WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN

Fav 185 4687 19398
share tweet
(720): View more from Colorado

I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.

Fav 8 2917 866
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(650): View more from California

I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.

Fav 18 1223 3138
share tweet
(740): View more from Ohio

well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.

Fav 12 4847 1143
share tweet
25 People Didn’t Realize They Were Talking To Someone Famous
Read it at the TFLN blog
(610): View more from Pennsylvania

you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.

Fav 3 2613 996
share tweet
(410): View more from Maryland

And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..

Fav 19 5516 1527
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(612): View more from Minnesota

The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question

Fav 8 3582 1181
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(561): View more from Florida

I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it

Fav 5 770 509
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(864): View more from South Carolina

Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?

(803): View more from South Carolina

Yeah, why?

(864): View more from South Carolina

The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries

Fav 0 45 3
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT