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• (858): View more from California

  My sheets look like a crime scene.

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• (706): View more from Georgia

  Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.

  (1-706): View more from Georgia

  Well thats $24,000 well spent.

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• (925): View more from California

  i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them

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• (404): View more from Georgia

  just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING

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• 

  Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (267): View more from Pennsylvania

  She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.

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• (201): View more from New Jersey

  at one point last night, you were literally auctioning me off. "reeeally drunk hot girl ! we'll start the bidding at an ice cold corona. oh, we have a bidder! do i hear a shot of whiskey? going once, going twice.."

  (1-201): View more from New Jersey

  youre welcome

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• (417): View more from Missouri

  how was ur day?

  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.

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• (818): View more from California

  he made a bald eagle out of coke lines

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• (603): View more from New Hampshire

  sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?

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• 

  21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers

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• (647): View more from Ontario

  Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.

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• (410): View more from Maryland

  So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.

  (443): View more from Maryland

  YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?

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• (818): View more from California

  So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth

  (323): View more from California

  Gross

  (818): View more from California

  AN ACTUAL PICKLE

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• (307): View more from Wyoming

  Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.

  (303): View more from Colorado

  Jesus Christ you're perfect.

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• (352): View more from Florida

  Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition

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• (651): View more from Minnesota

  What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?

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