It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
I FOUND THE LEGS
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
Randomize
