Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
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