Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
Randomize
