i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
Just saw some airport workers running through the terminal with liquor bottles. That's my kind of emergency.
Fell in the ditch running from the pizza guy I stole the pizza from. If you are still at my house come find me, pretty sure I need stitches.
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
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