I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
the cop found his r2d2 bong and asked me if i ever smoked out of him. i'm like, no sir. he's like ahh. if i were to smoke, it'd definitely be out of some star wars character.
easily made my night.
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Randomize
