the cop asked for your social security number and you gave her your high school locker combo
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Randomize