I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
We have an albino peacock in our apartment. It's beautiful.
Scratch it being beautiful, bitch just stole my McDonalds. Call animal control.
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
Randomize
