Hey man sorry I got all grabby
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
My most recent midlife crisis involved eating a doughnut in 30 seconds but taking 5 minutes to do half a shot of whiskey, then deciding I wasn't going to finish it.
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
Let's get the cat blown out
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
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