Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
I seem to have left my pride at pride
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
Randomize