I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
Randomize
