apparently the secret to your success is patron
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
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