I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
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