You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
do you know what's more awkward than a positive pregnancy in a public bathroom?
not a thing
walking in on a stranger's positive pregnancy test in a public bathroom
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
The shit I just took was my body's way of telling me bourbon and mixed nuts aren't an appropriate dinner. Well played, colon. WELL. PLAYED.
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
Randomize