I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
Randomize
